Now how ironic is it that I legit had to use technology to come up with an idea to write about? So this post is going to be about technology. (Like that wasn’t evident enough.) I saw a video a while back which got me thinking about how really dependant I was on technology to get my shiz done. Now, don’t get me wrong, I appreciate technology. (Heck, I more than appreciate it. I’d share a pizza with it) But, there are certain times I wished I still remembered how it was like to be independent and useful. (Unlike right now.) So, here are a list of things I wished I still knew.
There was this time that Android didn’t have spell check(or if you’re fancy, autocorrect) and you’d have to enable it for it to start working on your phone. I still was bad at spelling but I knew something was up if there was a red line. So while I was still using that version of Android I knew half my Goddamn spellings. But ever since I began using the gift of the gods, otherwise known as autocorrect (I’m fancy too, okay? Spell check is sooo 2010) I can’t spell for nuts. I legit can’t spell ‘disappointed’. Now that seems right but what I spell on a daily basis is ‘dissappointed’. Now, that’s a problem (My English teacher would be dissappointed). Also, you’d think I’d know how to spell ‘scissors’ or ‘tomorrow’ but, NO. For the longest time, I’d been spelling them as ‘scissorrs’ and ‘tommorow’. (And I’m not even kidding- I don’t even know how I came up with the spelling for scissors.) So whenever I need to use tomorrow, I’m still a little unsure about the spelling so I just use ‘morrow’. (I KNOW. GEEEEENIUS-Oh, speaking of, honest to god, I spelt genius as genuis. For real. Not even kidding. That happened. Just right now.)
2) Things, in general.
If you were to ask me what you should have for breakfast today, I’d literally Google ‘Things to have for breakfast if you’re lazy. Ps- It’s a Wednesday morning’. And don’t even try to lie to yourself, I know you do that too. I know you, boo. I got you. If you called me up to ask for a problem which I would have known and arrived at the answer if I sat down for three minutes and tried to work it out, I’d already be typing the entire friggin’ problem out in the search bar to find the answer and then take credit for it. Also, if you asked me what day today was, I’d switch my phone on and check my top bar. If you wanted to know the time and the only reason you asked me was because I was wearing a watch, I’d never look into the watch. Guess where I’d look into? Yep. My phone.
Now, if you know me personally, you know I suck at directions. I can’t even tell you how to get to my house if you’re two streets away from it. I’m that bad. I can’t remember street names, places or buildings but what I can remember are the names of all the people that worked with Obama. I’m that good and I’m not even ashamed of it. (A tad bit maybe but I could easily not care too.) But if you were to give me internet access, hon, I’d take you places you’ve never been to before (And then we’d get lost coming back but that’s not what I’m getting at.) My GPS game is so lit that I never have to remember places. I mean, why would you? If you screw up, you can always blame the GPS or the satellites or the prime minister or the water department. But, if you took matter to your own hands and directed people using the knowledge in thy head and ended up in the South of Africa, then there’d be a problem. So again, technology deprived me learning places and I’m not even mad.
4) Phone numbers, birthdays, things to do. Holy lord, responsibilities.
If you check my phone right now under a folder called Life, here are the things you’d find. Reminders for the day, week and the month. (I keep them all updated. Haphazardly and that is why I don’t get things done), birthdays (I have birthdays of probably 17 people registered but wish only 8 because the other 9 never wished me), phone numbers (I can’t…..I can’t even elaborate on this. Not even going to try to because I’m bad at remembering phone numbers. Period) and lastly, notes. And what, you ask, do I need notes for? To write about all the songs I heard but couldn’t download immediately. To write the names of people because I’m stupid and I can’t remember stuff. To write the ONE thing I was supposed to get from the store. If it wasn’t for these, I’d have no life and negative friends. Not zero but negative. (Which is why I’m glad for the three friends I do have)
So there. Technology saved my butt a ton of times which makes it all the more reliable. Which is bad because hello? you’ve got a brain for a reason and you’re the most highly evolved animal but you can’t remember stuff for shiz but can come up with stuff that’ll keep downing your brain performance. Funny people, humans are. But, no one’s complaining because I, for one, couldn’t imagine life without technology. So, NOPE to early-man kind of living without technology. I’ll pass, thank you very much!
Anyhoo, until our time meets again,
(Feel free to leave a comment down below. Don’t be shy. Do it. Go ahead. DO IT. I dare you. I DOUBLE DARE YOU. DO IT. JK.- No, I’m not.)