RELATIONSHIP I HAVE WITH MY PANTS.

Hi! If you’re new, the perplexity is understandable but, if you’re an OG around here, I do NOT comprehend your confusion. Hadn’t we already spit shaked on the whole ‘nothing is normal with me or my writing?’ I believe we had.

Moving on, I was recently bouncing around the internet (The Gift of the Gods) and found this lady on Pinterest who wrote about 22 prompts for a fun blog idea. (There are more on there but it was a lady that reblogged what I read. So, I’m sorry I’m not giving credits to the original writer. I can’t, really. Anyway, shout out to whoever came up with this AND who’s never going to find this post.) Out of the many ideas there were, two pulled me in and I can’t say what the other one was because you nasties tend to steal. Jk. I was particularly drawn to ‘If My Life Was Like The Kardashians’ and ‘The Relationship I Have With My Pants’. Out of the two, I HAD to pick the latter because, Ya know?

Relationship Status: More than pleased with my pants, thank you very much.

Here’s a mandatory question of very deep, deep thoughts- What would life be without having pants on? A lawsuit. Damn right, you’d be in jail. That being said, pants are important. Without discriminating between the kinds, here’s real talk, they’re what makes our everyday. Period. You’d wear no pants and walk out baring all, one day? Yah, I didn’t think so. Which made it easier to decide this could be a good idea for a blog post. Everyone wears pants. For all you know, we could be pants. Why the heck not? Halloween is just around the corner, too. Be like pants. Be pants. Ignite your inner pants. (Yep, I’m done.) [Just to throw it out there, there was no particular purpose of writing what I just did.]

My relationship: 

I have a darn good relationship with my pants. You’ll see why.

-Black pants that are still black and not the disgusting faded grey ones that they tend to become after one wash. (Before you automatically assume I’m an unhygienic pig and never washes them because black can never stay black for longer than three washes, just to be clear, I wash them. Like once every 8 months.) They’re pretty good if you just want to wear them by themselves. *winks* Relationship: A very snazzy power couple. 

-Leggings/tights/yoga pants that squeeze the living Jesus out of me but they’ve got my behind (Pun very much intended.) when I need my toosh to look extra fine and in your face. (Thank me later *winks again*). Relationship: More than pleased with how good we look together. 

-Grey faded ones (They went from a dark grey to the color of a dry pimple because someone decided to wash the pants like they were bathing a buffalo.), that also does its work and keeps everything in place and does a pretty good job at that. Relationship: A constant ‘just-hitched’ phase.

-God-awful blue jeans that I can never seem to pair anything with but just sits there taking space. These looked ridiculously fiiiiiine on the poster with the girl sprawled all over a vehicle-less road but when it came to me, Heaven Forbid you ever see me with those on. Relationship: Dangerously close to leaving its sorry ass and walking out.

-Ripped jeans that allow me to wear holed T-shirts becuase IT’S IN VOGUE! Torn pants and torn jeans, I FRICKIN’ MATCH! In all honesty though, the ones that I own could potentially be my favorites. Relationship: I’d take a bullet for you. (No, literally. Another hole could just be all that it needed.)

-Shorts. Becuase they’re only really pants. They do the same exact thing a pair of pants would do except hiding your hideous amazonic growth of hair. I’m grateful for these in particular because well, air-conditioning at its best. Relationship: We’re holidaying in Hawaii next weekend.

There you have it. It probably just sounded better in my head but then again, we aren’t known to keep it all in the head on here.

Also, between you and me, have you picked up that I CAN.NOT spell ‘because’ to save my soul.. I’ll just let it stay there ‘becuase’ flaws are key. (Again, no particular purpose of throwing this in here.)

Until our time meets again,

A

Fun fact: I thought I posted this once before but funny thing, it didn’t get published. Or maybe it did and you read it but it still said ‘Publish now’ so I had to repost this. If you’ve already read this last week then I’m sorry you had to read it again. (You shouldn’t be complaining, if you are, really. Shmurr.) Anyway, I did post this on a Saturday and been trying to ever since. So, yep. That’s my explanation if you’ve seen the same post twice. (I hope you didn’t ‘cuz ain’t NOBODY got no time to come up with a new idea.) Have a great day! x)

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